So, a "Bold," an "iPhone 3GS" and a "Pre" all walked into a bar......
OK, so let's try to envision this. It is a Friday night after a long week. Three "Amigos" decide to get together for an after work evening of drinks and catching up. Now, these three friends have a long history with one another - a history of trying to one-up each other about pretty much everything. Our night begins with the arrival of the first "friend."
A car pulls up to the bar - not just any car, but a beautiful, slick Porsche 911 Turbo. Out steps the iPhone 3GS. He looks quite dapper in his new non-smudge coating. He is wearing a beautiful Argentinean Vaja iVolution suit - must have set him back close to $150 for that - but he is wearing the colors of Italy and he looks smashing.
Next to arrive is the Palm Pre. He steps out of his Hybrid "Pre-us" and walks towards the bar. He isn't wearing any suit at all - I guess it was hard to find one that could cover him up and still allow him to slide out that tiny little keyboard of his. He waddles inside - his stout, rounded shape making it a bit difficult for him to walk upright.
The last to arrive is the BlackBerry Bold. He shows up on his Harley. When the rumble of the engine stops, he hops off the bike - still wearing his Otterbox suit after a hard day at work. He realized (because of the multiple alarms going off) that he is late to meet his friends, so he runs inside.
They take their seats and try to catch up with one another. Bold notices that iPhone is wearing a bandage on his finger. "What happened?" he asked his old friend? "Oh, it was just a busy day today. Lots of ‘Sliding to Unlock' and stuff - you know how it is."
The waitress comes over and asks them what they are drinking. iPhone goes first, sort of flexing and giving her the eye; "An Apple-Tini for Me" he says; "And make it a double." The Pre orders next; "I'll have a Heineken" he says smoothly. The Bold goes last; "Jack Daniels - straight up." The waitress leaves to fetch their orders.
All the while, iPhone and Bold notice Pre turning on and off with notifications. He certainly looks very slick as he flips through his "Cards" to check his email, return a missed call and check calendar appointments. But then they notice him start to sweat profusely. "You look tired, old friend" quips the Bold. "Yeah, all this multi-tasking is great - but by mid day I am pooped and need an extra charge just to make it through the night." "I see," said the Bold...but he really didn't - he realized he hadn't been charged since the day before and he was feeling more than half strength himself.
"Hey, let's check out the ladies" said the suave and debonair iPhone. He left his friends and meandered over to a sweet, young Samsung Instinct in the corner. Now, he knew that she had a little bit of "iPhone Envy" so he played it sort of cool. "Hi there," he started. "I see you trying to post on facebook. Why don't you log in on me - it is much easier." She was most appreciative. Now, iPhone always seems to go for those girls who weren't playing with a "full keyboard," and the Instinct was no exception to his rule.
"Sad," said Bold - "He just always seems to be trying to impress those who are just not quite as slick or smart as he is." iPhone then walked out of the bar and away from his friends with the little Instinct clutching his Vaja suit as they walked to his Porsche.
Pre looked at Bold and said he would be right back. He walked over to the corner and saw a very sad looking Treo pro. "What's the matter," he asked her? "Well," she said, "since you and your kind came around, not many people are even giving me the time of day anymore." "Oh, don't be said" said Pre. At that moment, he slid himself open to wrap his keys around her to comfort her. Unfortunately, the lower edge of his Keyboard slid right into her, producing a nice gash in her plastic coating. "Don't worry about that," he said. "It seems to be happening all the time these days, I know just what to do."
Just then, Pre and the little Treo Pro walked out of the bar with an ice pack on her cut plastic coating. They stepped into his "Pre-us" and went on their way.
That left Bold, alone at the bar , with his Jack Daniels in his TrackBall. He never moved. Then, almost predictably, a very nice, mature and full figured 8700 came over and sat next to him. "Your friends ditched you" she said to him. "Yeah, " said the Bold - "It happens all the time. Those guys both seem kind of uneasy and insecure - they just show it in different ways. My pal iPhone tries to be too slick and showy. My buddy Pre is trying to hard to please too many people. Both wind up making bad choices and keeping bad company. Talking to iPhone is like trying to type on glass - know what I mean? And Pre - he just tried to do so many things at one time that he just plum tuckers himself out and then can't do anything."
The 8700 looked into the screen of Bold and said he seemed like he was a good, reliable and dependable kind of guy - she then asked him if he would be willing to give her a ride home. "Sure, sugar" he said Boldly - and the two hopped onto his Harley and off they went.
Three friends walked into a bar and three friends walked out. One was slick, but lacked substance. One was trying to bridge the gap between the two extremes and found that he just couldn't do it all and one was maybe not the flashiest, and maybe not the most innovative - but he was reliable, dependable and powerful. In the end, that was what mattered most.