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The dumbest things CrackBerry Kevin did this year

YOLO!

By Adam Zeis on 17 Dec 2013 01:41 pm EST
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While we're rounding out 2013 with some year end posts, I wanted to sneak in one more before I forgot. I know that everyone loves Kevin and all that he's done for BlackBerry and CrackBerry -- myself included. But I wanted to take a minute to reflect on some of the dumb $hit that he's done over the last 12 months that certainly shouldn't be forgotten. Sure he's smart, dedicated and at times funny, but he can also be a flaming idiot. 

Just to quickly recap, it seems like the dumbness has only gotten worse over the years. In 2011 when left unattended, Kevin bought a $500 clock app for his BlackBerry. Dumb.

The dumbest moves from 2012:

And let's reflect on 2013:

  • Got his hair cut on stage in front of thousands of people live (and millions more on TV). CNBC aired it live. He even made the Economist
  • The drunken Q10 drop test. Even though it wasn't actually a real drop test, the fact that he made it into one was annoying and dumb.
  • Started a Sexy Guys in Yoga Shorts BBM Channel, posting only images of himself (little secret, he's really not flexible and sucks at yoga)
  • Yelled out PHON.ES! incessantly during conversations, at least three times a day
  • Kevin happened to be Miami during the iPhone 5s launch, so Rene from our sister site iMore tasked him with buying a phone. That said, he never told him to do what he ended up doing to get the gold one --- paying $1500!
  • Split his personalities into horcruxes.. starting first with his alter ego Cage Michaels (who is in alpha until he's officially unveiled later in 2014)

 

 

 

In all honestly, Kevin is a great isn't a bad boss. We really do love him and for the most part he does more good than dumb. Then again, CES is right around the corner. 

Reader comments

The dumbest things CrackBerry Kevin did this year

93 Comments

Looks like Adam is compiling a list to try and oust Kevin, and take over as CB's fearless leader! Lol

Posted via my AzzazzinBerry (STL100-3/10.2.1.1055)

This just means Adam has too much free time on his hands. Need to make him busier.

Hey Adam, how would you like to be Editor in Chief of Smartwatch Fans, too? I think you can manage that and your CB duties. Clearly you have the free time. :)

ADAMMMM!!!!!!!!!! This is the dumbest year end list ever. LOL.  

Nothing TOO CRAZY this year... still a couple weeks left in December for me to do something really dumb though :)

Also, technically the FIRST horcrux I made was/is CrackBerry Kevin. The second one is Cage Michaels (learn more at about.me/cagemichaels). And yes, that's what was in THE BOX.

Nobody with a head on their shoulders is falling for it Kevin...what was in THE BOX is special and maybe exciting, but this certainly wasn't it ;)

In any case, this was a pretty harmless year all things considered lol Strive to do more next year I suppose HAHAHA!!

Have a great Christmas and New Years!!

I offered the Daytona Speedway and big wheels to you! That could have been escalated way beyond the original plan....Just sayin....lol
Thanks for all the informtainment!

IMHO. The workout video can go another year.....2012/2013 Its that ridiculous. haha

If you ever went 100% dumer-er-er-er-er-eererereereereeeerrrr, streaking with a blackberry 10 device over those private areas at a CES event would be the most insane thing ever. NEVER EVER DO THAT!!! EVER. Wouldn't want to see anyone do that (but it would probably get THE MOST media ever!).

Posted via CB10

Can we add to the list? I can maybe recollect a few.

While I have been known to criticize (I know, I know hard to believe) however, In the spirit of the season I'll extend a hardy thanks to Kevin and company for providing us this fun, interesting, useful, challenging and infuriating community. Happy Holidays and best wishes for a happy, healthy, profitable 2014.

Thanks for the kind words!

Definitely add to the list! I try and do at least one dumb thing every day (it keeps life fun), so I'm sure Adam missed a few here. Feel free to add.

What the heck is a horcrux? Sounds like a really bad venereal disease.

Posted via my sexy-ass Z10 running 10.2.0.1803 ON A BOAT!!!

This is what makes CrackBerry fun and not dull or boring. Thanks for a great year Kevin, Adam, Blaze and the rest of the gang. Keep up the great work, the crazy antics and the all around silly funness. Looking forward to more in 2014.
Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas

Hey Adam, what about Super Hero Kevin and fighting the bad guys in Europe when they tried to rob him? Guess its not really a dumb thing, but more of positive good thing huh?

Kevin don't forget you promised to buy someone a car if Instagram did not make it to BB10. That should have made the list!

Poetry in Motion

This is totally off topic but do you have any clue when iGrann comes to BlackBerry World?

Posted via CB10

Drink a bottle of petron 40 minutes before your final podcast for the year. Should make for great viewing ;-p

Posted via CB10

Funny story. When I was 17, I drank a 26 of Tequila. It was that crappy Sauza stuff. Happened at a bush party... like 8pm. I was messsed up almost instantly. Friends carried me out of the bush and took me to my parents house (they were telling me it was 4am and it was time to go home). I was kind of shocked when my dad opened the door almost immediately (i thought it was 4am, right?). Turns out it was like 9pm. Puked my guts out all night. 

To this day the word Tequila still makes me cringe. Hmm.. now that I think about it, that might be where my streak of doing dumb things began. Following that, I did win a Jalepeno pepper eating contest the next year in school (in front of 450 students). 

It all makes sense now. :)

Ken is one person who likes to live his life the way he wants.... and hence the people see those dumb moments... but they are really enjoyable...

At the age of say 70 years... if you look back and if your grandkids ask what was the craziest thing you did.. Kevin has the biggest list :D

Keep it up Kevin... enjoying CrackBerry and yes... Even I do the same...
Live.Life.Enjoy coz we only have one life :)

Posted via CB10

Adam should add one of the dumbest things that Kevin did is hiring someone who can track all his dumbest records...

Posted via CB10

I don't remember what year it was, but the Incredible Hulk Kevin certainly looks dumb.

But seriously, you rock, Kevin!

Z10STL100-1/10.2.1.1055

Keep us laughing guys! We sometimes can take smartphones so seriously... In another 20 years we'll look back and say "What? We used to carry little flat bricks around and hold them up to our ears?". ;-). Kevin... Looking forward to more of your crazy antics! It is what makes CB so fun!

I would like to pounce on him to for that stuff, but since I grew a mullet to support him not cutting his hair, I will shut up now, except to say this, no matter what your IQ is it can not prevent you from making a fool of yourself, life is long $&it happens.

CrackBerry Kevin is a really, really good mobile analyst / commentator...

But, buying that iPhone 5s for $1500 and then going on a BlackBerry bloggers hangout to brag about it afterwards was by far the stupidest thing he's done in years.

Posted via CB10

I also think Kevin's failure to review the Z30 probably should have made the list. I think we could all tell he wasn't as enthusiastic about it and the review done by Simon Sage was excellent, but it just seems like, if you are going to be CBK and BlackBerry releases a new flagship device, you have to review it.

On the other hand, Kevin's later podcast commentary on the Z30 was pretty good, but still... he does realize that we don't *just* tune in to crackberry.com for the contests, right? His review of a flagship device matters around here...

Posted via CB10

Once 10.2.1 gets official I'll do a review / re-review of the Z30 and BB10. That's a great time for us to revisit everything as I **think** that's when we'll see BB start to do some remarketing (once regular folks can easily get their apps.. aka android apps).

Not to be too negative on a fun thread, but CBK did more than three really awesome things as well this year. I still can't get over how great the coverage of BlackBerry Live was. I'm still a little ticked at BlackBerry for not releasing a tablet or cool SaaS at the event, so that the cheer could have been illustrated via the livestreaming.

Posted via CB10