Dear Berry with Mara Blumenthal Dear Berry,

A friend and I got into a terrible argument. He wouldn't stop using his Blackberry. At night, then the next morning, then in the bathroom, then at lunch and dinner. I was furious. We were back in the room watching a DVD, having gone on a two day weekend get-a-way, and there it was again. So I gave him 3 warnings and said I was going to throw it out if he didn't put it down. He kept going so I took the Blackberry and threw it over the balcony and into the bushes - I swear he was going to follow it off the balcony. It ended up somewhere in the bushes. He was furious. The BB was found with only the battery out and door off. The problem was the screen was cracked (money isn't an issue - he can easily replace it/no data lost) and now he doesn't want to be friends anymore!  We are now in a HUGE fight!! He is so disrespectful with the use of his BB. What do I do? HELP!

End Friendship because of a BB

Dear "End Friendship because of a BB",

There are definitely some bigger issues here that need to be resolved. However, it sounds to me that this BB argument represents much deeper issues in your relationship. You need to ask yourself a few difficult questions about the friendship. What it means to you and is it worth struggling through to try to change it. Also, is he willing to compromise to meet you halfway on his BB use and whatever other issues the two of you might have going on with each other? Clearly, if no data was lost and he can replace the unit easily, then that isn't the issue, which could have been quite significant for him.

I would recommend speaking with him about your friendship. If it's a lengthy and/or meaningful friendship you might not want to just let it go. However, there are times when close friends outgrow friendships and it can be quite sad but it's time to move on. What isn't good is constant tension and fighting where neither of you feels like your being acknowledged. Take it slow and see how you feel after he has given you his side of things. He might surprise you and you will hear things you had no idea he was feeling. Give it a very fair chance and if that doesn't work, part ways and wish him well.

Best of luck,