Yes, the title almost sounds like a song by C & C Music Factory. I had to put a twist on the title though, as this is about applications that you wouldn’t think were out there. If I could have borrowed another quote, I would have said “There’s an app for that? Are you freaking kidding me?!” Check out BlackBerry App World, CrackBerry App Store and others and you will find the most obscure applications. For some, I could see them as being handy or for a good laugh. Others were simply too odd, too annoying, or just too ridiculous. There’s a lot more out there that I thought there would be. I put together a list of those that had caught my eye; some good, some not so good. Take a look and see if there are others you would add.
I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore
Not necessarily good or bad, these applications just caught my eye and made me say “hmmm”
The only thing that makes me go hmm is this question: Why wouldn’t you download this application?! Who wouldn’t want a big button with the CrackBerry logo to press? I jumped on this the day it was announced. Listeners of the CrackBerry Podcasts will recognize the sound bytes played after each button press. As the description says, you’ll have minutes of fun listening to the voice talent of the late, great Don LaFontaine. Share some CrackBerry love until they tell you to shut up. The CrackBerry Button is available for free. This one’s for you Don...
Ever had a moment when someone irritates you so much you want to shoot them, even if it’s with your finger? Storm user can take it to the next level with Revolver. On screen, you can spin the cylinder and load bullets in each chamber. Then, with a swipe or a flick of your Storm, you can fire off some rounds. Let loose a hail of imaginary bullets, wreak havoc on annoying co-workers, relish in the sweet taste of the non-existent mayhem, at least until your boss tells you to get back to work. Revolver is available for $2.99.
This one is just plain spooky, it might even be freaky. This application, which should be only taken in fun, is supposed to be able to calculate your “expiry date”. Your end is determined by factors such as gender, bad habits (like smoking) and so on. There are two modes to choose from; optimistic mode and sadistic mode. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather not know. Scratch that, I’d rather take out an extended warranty on myself. Death Clock is available for $3.99.
Arrr Mate, what kind of app be this? There are many translator applications out there, but this one shivers me timbers. This application takes modern English to translate it into pirate talk. Your inner pirate is dying to set sail and now you can give it a voice. You can share your “words o’ wisdom” directly from the app, in an email, text or tweet. Translating doesn’t always work, so you’ll just have to put on an extra thick pirate accent to cover it up. Now you have an excuse for the parrot that sits on your shoulder. TalkLikeAPirate is free.
Massage Therapy for BlackBerry
So you set your BlackBerry to vibrate for discreet notifications. How about setting it for relaxation? This application takes your BlackBerry’s vibrating function in another direction. There are twelve different settings to choose from; ranging from soft and soothing to hard and intense. There’s nothing like someone walking in to see you massage yourself with a BlackBerry. I’m not sure what prolonged use will do to your BlackBerry, but a long massage might put you to sleep. If that’s the case, make sure you set your alarm. Massage Therapy for BlackBerry costs $2.95.
Look! I can make a rabbit! I can make a dog! I can make a Bold 9700! If you’re not sure what you can make with a wall and a light, the application lists 50 different, categorized shadow puppets. Though not very detailed, the application will give you the basic idea behind each shadow puppet. If you don’t have a flash light or candle handy, you can always use your BlackBerry! Shadow Puppets is on sale for $2.99 until December 24th.
I always let out a little gas –d’i mean chuckle –whenever I come across an application that features flatulence. I guess it truly goes to show you that BlackBerrys definitely aren’t just for business users. For the cheese cutting connoisseur, iBee Farting serves up a multitude of, um, interesting burps and farts to choose from. If none hit you just right, you can record your own, erm, masterpieces. You can also choose up a time delay so you can hide your BlackBerry on an unsuspecting person, and let the rip roaring fun begin. iBee Farting goes for $1.99.
When you see a name like Storm Fu, you might think of an application that might help you learn Kung Fu. Wrong. Okay, well maybe an action packed game where you kick and punch your way through hundreds of enemies. Nope. This application offers up sounds effects when you punch the air (with Storm in hand) and Bruce Lee quotes with a click of the screen. So you won’t become a Kung Fu Master, but at least you can scare off anyone who cuts into a line up for a new BlackBerry. StormFu costs you $2.99.
Ah Ha! Lite
My wife pointed out that having a menstrual cycle application on a BlackBerry is just plain weird. This one offers some help for the guys in understanding a woman’s cycle and how to act (or stay away). Learn what to expect, how she’s feeling, and what to do. The Full version includes tips to stay out of the dog house, a perpetual calendar that maps her stages and password protection. It’s definitely an interesting read, though personally I would talk to my wife and work through it with her, rather than working through it with my BlackBerry (right honey?). Ah Ha! Lite is free.
Chillout Light 2009
One word comes to mind every time I see this application; why? The idea behind this is to help relieve your stress by staring at colour combinations and light effects. Honestly, I can think of better ways to relax; go for a walk, breathe, listen to Yanni, or even brickbreaker. Those passing by will just see someone mesmerized by their BlackBerry. What stresses me out is the fact this Chillout Light 2009 costs $4.99!
You are now exiting the Twilight Zone
Did you see anything you’d download? I did. There’s so many more out there to discover. Maybe you found them already. Maybe you’d like to share. Obviously these apps were created for the greater good, so perhaps you could find them useful. If you had another app that you think should have been added, leave a comment!